I read the words tonight that the storm is officially here and realized that those words mean something very different to me as a survivor. Honestly, I wanted to ask them when exactly they thought the storm ever left. Sometimes, I feel like I've come so far and learned so much. Then there are moments … Continue reading The Storm is Officially Here
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I Could Not Call Him Father
When I first started healing, I could not even think about my dad. It brought so much pain and loss to the surface. I don't know what I wanted or expected when I first listened to the video at the end of this post, but it certainly wasn't the emotional reaction I had. Nonetheless, it's … Continue reading I Could Not Call Him Father
Can My Parts Hear Me Talking to Them?
With dissociative identity disorder (DID) that developed outside of SRA or mind control programming, parts tend to be able to hear each other much easier. They have a much less developed internal world without the bombs and traps that send survivors spiraling when set off. The front presenter part can still go for years without … Continue reading Can My Parts Hear Me Talking to Them?
Why “Send It Back to the Sender” Can Backfire
Here is a question another survivor asked, and every survivor eventually has to face: What happens if you know you are experiencing witchcraft, but you don’t realize that the source is you? What happens if you ask God to send it back to the sender, only to discover that you are the sender, and you … Continue reading Why “Send It Back to the Sender” Can Backfire
Learning to Trust Again
“Trust in YHWH with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5–6 Let’s be honest, sometimes trust feels like walking into a battlefield blindfolded. It feels raw and dangerous, and everything in us is screaming don’t do it. … Continue reading Learning to Trust Again
A LOVE LETTER TO MY CULT LOYAL PARTS
Hi there, There is so much that I wish I could tell the world about you. I know how they look at you, blame you, detest you, and reject you. I see how they cross the street if they see you walk their way. The sidewalks are not big enough to hold the truth. So, … Continue reading A LOVE LETTER TO MY CULT LOYAL PARTS
Working Through Programming Triggers
When a survivor tries to leave, starts to remember a memory, gets a big breakthrough, or starts to integrate parts of themselves, all hell tends to break lose. Programming can get activated without the survivor's knowledge, and the script will lie to them non-stop until they can recognize it and replace it with the truth. … Continue reading Working Through Programming Triggers
Redemptive Gifts
For many SRA survivors, their presenting parts are not connected to their spirit. One way to know if you are disconnected from your spirit is if you cannot hear Yahweh’s voice. Another way is if you do not know about any of your programming or have your memories because your spirit knows all. It is … Continue reading Redemptive Gifts
A Mundane Sunday Until…
Have you ever had a dream that you knew was so much more than just a dream? I don’t usually remember my dreams very well, but when I do, they are packed with weirdness and information. Last night’s dream was no exception. It was a warning from the occult. I am not naïve to how … Continue reading A Mundane Sunday Until…
The Lie I Believed
I’ve been reflecting on who I am and how I am doing in the “quiet” parts of my life. When I’m at home with pajamas on and unkept hair with just my daughter, who does she say that I am? I can get so caught up in what the next step is or what I should be doing … Continue reading The Lie I Believed